It's all about money for Xxx-bank Credit Cards when you die. This is too funny! It takes all kinds to make the world go round. Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is easy to see happening, customer service being what it is…

My Aunt died this past January. xxxbank billed her for February and March for their monthly service charge on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge... the balance had been $0.00... Now it was somewhere around $60.00. I placed the following phone call to Xxx-bank:

Me: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January."

Xxx-bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Me: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections"

Xxx-bank: "Since it is 2 months past due, it already has been."

Me: "So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

Xxx-bank: "Either report her account to the frauds division, or report her to the credit bureau maybe both!"

Me: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

Xxx-bank:"...excuse me...?"

Me: "Did you just get what I was telling you... the part about her being dead?"

Xxx-bank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor!"

(Supervisor gets on the phone)

Me: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."

Xxx-bank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Me: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

Xxx-bank: "…(stammer)" "…Are you her lawyer?"

Me: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given…)

Xxx-bank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

Me: "Sure."

(Fax number is given)

(After they get the fax.)

Xxx-bank: "Our system just isn't setup for death"

Me: "Oh..."

Xxx-bank: "I don't know what more I can do to help."

Me: "Well...if you figure it out,great! If not, you could just keep billing her...I suppose... Don't really think she will care...."

Xxx-bank: "Well...the late fees and charges do still apply."

Me: "Would you like her new billing address?"

Xxx-bank: "That might help."

Me: "Nilai Memorial Park Cemetery (North South Highway and plot number given.)

Xxx-bank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

Me: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan tapi beliau suka ngabur alias suka gak ada di tempatnya?

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan tapi beliau sukanya cuma mengatur dan tidak mau kerja?

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan tapi beliau tidak pernah mau masuk di luar hari kerja alias gak mau ngelembur?

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan tapi beliau suka mutung alias gampang merajuk bagai anak kecil kehilangan mainan?

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan tapi beliau bisa berkata 'a' di depan tapi di belakang berkata 'b' alias plintat-plintut?

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan yang kelihatannya moralis tapi bisa dengan tiba-tiba bertanya yang a-moralis?

apa jadinya kalau anda punya atasan tapi beliau bisa menilai seseorang kerjanya tidak bagus padahal ia belum melihat pekerjaan orang itu alias punya indra keenam (kali) ya?

jadilah jagung, jangan jambu monyet.
jagung membungkus bijinya yang banyak, sedangkan jambu monyet memamerkan bijinya yang cuma satu-satunya.
artinya: jangan suka pamer

jadilah pohon pisang.
pohon pisang kalau berbuah hanya sekali, lalu mati.
artinya: kesetiaan dalam pernikahan.

jadilah duren, jangan kedondong
walaupun luarnya penuh kulit yang tajam, tetapi dalamnya lembut dan manis, hmmmm, beda dengan kedondong, luarnya mulus, rasanya agak asem dan di dalamnya ada biji yang berduri.
artinya: don't Judge a book by it’s cover, jangan menilai orang dari luarnya saja.

jadilah bengkoang.
walaupun hidup dalam kompos sampah, tetapi umbinya isinya putih bersih.
artinya: jagalah hati jangan kau nodai.

jadilah tandan pete, bukan tandan rambutan.
tandan pete membagi makanan sama rata ke biji petenya, semua seimbang, tidak seperti rambutan. ada yang kecil ada yang gede.
artinya: selalu adil dalam bersikap.

jadilah cabe.
makin tua makin pedas.
artinya: makin tua makin bijaksana.

jadilah buah manggis
bisa ditebak isinya dari pantat buahnya.
artinya: jangan munafik

jadilah buah nangka selain buahnya, nangka memberi getah kepada penjual atau yang memakannya.
artinya: berikan kesan kepada semua orang (tentunya yang baik).

Put about 100 bricks in some particular order in a closed room with an open window. Then send 2 or 3 candidates in the room and close the door. Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours and then analyze the situation.

If they are counting the bricks. Put them in the accounts department.
If they are recounting them.. Put them in auditing.
If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks. Put them in engineering.
If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order. Put them in planning.
If they are throwing the bricks at each other. Put them in operations
If they are sleeping. Put them in security.
If they have broken the bricks into pieces. Put them in information technology.
If they are sitting idle. Put them in human resources.
If they say they have tried different combinations, yet not a brick has been moved. Put them in sales.
If they have already left for the day. Put them in marketing.
If they are staring out of the window. Put them on strategic planning

And then last but not least. If they are talking to each other and not a single brick has been moved. Congratulate them and put them in top management.